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I do stuff. So there.
Hello, my name is Shane Williams and I do stuff. The things you will find here are my passions. I love to design, write, create, explore, and have fun! Take a look around... you never know what you'll find in Shane's Brain!
Funny Anti Trump Shirt - ramalambadingdong T-Shirt
Everyone loves this funny anti-Trump shirt. Well ok, not everyone. You’ll get big laughs as you wear this to political rallies and other events. Makes a great gift for all your anti-Trump family and friends!
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding Dong
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause It's mine, oh mine
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's fine to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
You won't believe
That it's mine, oh mine
I love it, love it, love it so
And I never, never let it go
One thing is certain
It's mine, oh mine (it's mine, it's mine)
All of the time
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause it's mine, oh mine
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Oh, I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never let it go
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I don't love another so
And it's mine, oh mine
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding Dong
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause It's mine, oh mine
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's fine to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
You won't believe
That it's mine, oh mine
I love it, love it, love it so
And I never, never let it go
One thing is certain
It's mine, oh mine (it's mine, it's mine)
All of the time
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause it's mine, oh mine
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Oh, I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never let it go
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I don't love another so
And it's mine, oh mine
Ramalambadingdong Funny Anti Biden T-Shirt
Everyone loves this funny anti-Biden shirt. Well ok, not everyone. You’ll get big laughs as you wear this to political rallies and other events. Makes a great gift for all your anti-Biden family and friends!
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding Dong
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause It's mine, oh mine
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's fine to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
You won't believe
That it's mine, oh mine
I love it, love it, love it so
And I never, never let it go
One thing is certain
It's mine, oh mine (it's mine, it's mine)
All of the time
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause it's mine, oh mine
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Oh, I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never let it go
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I don't love another so
And it's mine, oh mine
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding Dong
Ram a Lamb a Ram a Lamb a Lamb a Ding
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause It's mine, oh mine
Oh, oh, oh
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's fine to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
You won't believe
That it's mine, oh mine
I love it, love it, love it so
And I never, never let it go
One thing is certain
It's mine, oh mine (it's mine, it's mine)
All of the time
I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
It's everything to me
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never set it free
'Cause it's mine, oh mine
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Dong)
Ram a Lamb a (Ding Ding Dong)
Oh, I've got a shirt named
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I’ll never let it go
Ram a Lamb a, Ram a Lamb a Ding Dong
I don't love another so
And it's mine, oh mine
Once In A Blue Moon Funny Witty T-Shirt
The moon is beautiful.
It’s big.
Really big.
It’s round.
1,079.4 miles around, to be exact.
It’s bright.
We actually aren’t certain how bright.
It has craters.
It moves around the Earth.
If it fell on you, you would die.
These are all true facts about the moon. They are concrete facts that will probably never change in our lifetimes.
But it isn’t blue. That’s pretty obvious.
So what does “Once in a blue moon” even mean? It’s supposed to mean rarely, but if moons never turn blue, shouldn’t it mean never?
Actually, it did happen twice, once in 1883, and another in 1950. Apparently smoke in the area clouded the skies so thickly that the moon appeared blue for several days.
Ok, so we’ve been humiliated by Google again.
But that still means that when someone says something happens “once in a blue moon” they are referring to an event that happened in 1883 or 1950, right? Well, that shortens the list.
In commemoration of this shirt, let’s look at some things that happen once in a blue moon:
The founding of Life Magazine
The publishing of The Adventures of Pinocchio by Carlo Collodi
The Battle of Gia Cuc
Liquified oxygen
The world’s first rodeo
Cinderella
The eruption of Mauna Loa
Brazil lost the World Cup (Dang, that one is rare)
Well, you get the idea.
For other occasions that don’t normally occur in a blue moon, you can wear this shirt! It’s such a beautiful design that is subtly hilarious. It makes a perfect gift for friends, family, moon lovers... or anyone born in 1883 or 1950, for that matter! They were born once in a blue moon, after all!
It’s big.
Really big.
It’s round.
1,079.4 miles around, to be exact.
It’s bright.
We actually aren’t certain how bright.
It has craters.
It moves around the Earth.
If it fell on you, you would die.
These are all true facts about the moon. They are concrete facts that will probably never change in our lifetimes.
But it isn’t blue. That’s pretty obvious.
So what does “Once in a blue moon” even mean? It’s supposed to mean rarely, but if moons never turn blue, shouldn’t it mean never?
Actually, it did happen twice, once in 1883, and another in 1950. Apparently smoke in the area clouded the skies so thickly that the moon appeared blue for several days.
Ok, so we’ve been humiliated by Google again.
But that still means that when someone says something happens “once in a blue moon” they are referring to an event that happened in 1883 or 1950, right? Well, that shortens the list.
In commemoration of this shirt, let’s look at some things that happen once in a blue moon:
The founding of Life Magazine
The publishing of The Adventures of Pinocchio by Carlo Collodi
The Battle of Gia Cuc
Liquified oxygen
The world’s first rodeo
Cinderella
The eruption of Mauna Loa
Brazil lost the World Cup (Dang, that one is rare)
Well, you get the idea.
For other occasions that don’t normally occur in a blue moon, you can wear this shirt! It’s such a beautiful design that is subtly hilarious. It makes a perfect gift for friends, family, moon lovers... or anyone born in 1883 or 1950, for that matter! They were born once in a blue moon, after all!
She Liked Pina Coladas Funny Wicked Witch T-Shirt
Have you ever noticed that the wicked witch was not the brightest bulb in the package? She knows that water will make her melt and yet there are big buckets of it just sitting around her castle and she keeps lighting the scarecrow on fire. Sorry lady, but that was an accident just waiting to happen.
And then after she melts, her henchman and everybody start praising Dorothy? “Hail Dorothy! The Wicked Witch is dead!” They all take what just happened at face value. You'd think that at least one or two of them would be like, “Wait a minute.... water? This whole time? Hmmm, no wonder she didn’t come to my swim party.”
Then there’s the Munchkins... I bet they were pretty annoyed when they found out! Hey Charlie, you know that witch that’s been harassing us for 30 years? Turns out she’s H20 intolerant. Yeah, we could have just sprayed her with the hose!
It’s really pretty pathetic when you think about it, when you stack it up against other monsters and villains. How do you kill a vampire? Wooden stake through the heart! Werewolf? Silver bullet through the heart! A dragon? Enchanted sword through the heart! Wicked witch? Squirt gun.
With a nemesis like water, how in the world did she live so long in the first place? You’re telling us, she never got caught in the rain. I mean, she drives a broom, it’s not like she can just roll up the window.
You know what else it means.... she’s never taken a shower. Yeah..... well, no wonders she’s so grumpy.... and green..... and single.
Speaking of that, I would love to watch the wicked witch looking at personal ads in the newspaper. She’d be like, ok, let’s see.... this one looks pretty good..... “do you like piña coladas?” Oh yes, I love piña coladas, this could be the one..... let’s see what else.... “and getting caught in the rain” - oh crap. Poor wicked witch.
And then after she melts, her henchman and everybody start praising Dorothy? “Hail Dorothy! The Wicked Witch is dead!” They all take what just happened at face value. You'd think that at least one or two of them would be like, “Wait a minute.... water? This whole time? Hmmm, no wonder she didn’t come to my swim party.”
Then there’s the Munchkins... I bet they were pretty annoyed when they found out! Hey Charlie, you know that witch that’s been harassing us for 30 years? Turns out she’s H20 intolerant. Yeah, we could have just sprayed her with the hose!
It’s really pretty pathetic when you think about it, when you stack it up against other monsters and villains. How do you kill a vampire? Wooden stake through the heart! Werewolf? Silver bullet through the heart! A dragon? Enchanted sword through the heart! Wicked witch? Squirt gun.
With a nemesis like water, how in the world did she live so long in the first place? You’re telling us, she never got caught in the rain. I mean, she drives a broom, it’s not like she can just roll up the window.
You know what else it means.... she’s never taken a shower. Yeah..... well, no wonders she’s so grumpy.... and green..... and single.
Speaking of that, I would love to watch the wicked witch looking at personal ads in the newspaper. She’d be like, ok, let’s see.... this one looks pretty good..... “do you like piña coladas?” Oh yes, I love piña coladas, this could be the one..... let’s see what else.... “and getting caught in the rain” - oh crap. Poor wicked witch.
Get off my Lawn! Funny Old Yeller T-Shirt
Old people have been around since people got old. We imagine that was a while ago. Ever since then, old people have been amazing the world with bad memory, dentures, and hip replacements. Kind seniors love to do good deeds, bake cookies, knit sweaters, sip tea, tell stories, and other stereotypes. There are plenty of good, kind senior citizens.
But not all of them are.
Some of them seem to be on one sole mission: to be grumpy.
But we think being old would be awesome! You get to stop working, stop walking and stop caring. That sounds amazing! Sometimes we hear old people complaining about hip problems or knee problems or hip problems again. If they really thought about it, they’d see that there are so many positives to being old:
• Senior discounts!
• Everyone accepts that you’re going to forget their birthday.
• Early Bedtimes!
• Wrinkles! Not sure why, We just think they’re cool.
• People are constantly inventing new things specifically to make your life easier!
This funny t-shirt is a clever mix between the classic grumpy senior and the classic dead dog, finally giving the name Old Yeller a more fitting owner. And don’t worry about the dog getting upset that his name’s been stolen. After all, he’s dead. (Spoilert alert!)
But not all of them are.
Some of them seem to be on one sole mission: to be grumpy.
But we think being old would be awesome! You get to stop working, stop walking and stop caring. That sounds amazing! Sometimes we hear old people complaining about hip problems or knee problems or hip problems again. If they really thought about it, they’d see that there are so many positives to being old:
• Senior discounts!
• Everyone accepts that you’re going to forget their birthday.
• Early Bedtimes!
• Wrinkles! Not sure why, We just think they’re cool.
• People are constantly inventing new things specifically to make your life easier!
This funny t-shirt is a clever mix between the classic grumpy senior and the classic dead dog, finally giving the name Old Yeller a more fitting owner. And don’t worry about the dog getting upset that his name’s been stolen. After all, he’s dead. (Spoilert alert!)
Old Yeller Cartoon Funny T-Shirt
Old people have been around since people got old. We imagine that was a while ago. Ever since then, old people have been amazing the world with bad memory, dentures, and hip replacements. Kind seniors love to do good deeds, bake cookies, knit sweaters, sip tea, tell stories, and other stereotypes. There are plenty of good, kind senior citizens.
But not all of them are.
Some of them seem to be on one sole mission: to be grumpy.
But we think being old would be awesome! You get to stop working, stop walking and stop caring. That sounds amazing! Sometimes we hear old people complaining about hip problems or knee problems or hip problems again. If they really thought about it, they’d see that there are so many positives to being old:
• Senior discounts!
• Everyone accepts that you’re going to forget their birthday.
• Early Bedtimes!
• Wrinkles! Not sure why, We just think they’re cool.
• People are constantly inventing new things specifically to make your life easier!
This funny t-shirt is a clever mix between the classic grumpy senior and the classic dead dog, finally giving the name Old Yeller a more fitting owner. And don’t worry about the dog getting upset that his name’s been stolen. After all, he’s dead. (Spoilert alert!)
But not all of them are.
Some of them seem to be on one sole mission: to be grumpy.
But we think being old would be awesome! You get to stop working, stop walking and stop caring. That sounds amazing! Sometimes we hear old people complaining about hip problems or knee problems or hip problems again. If they really thought about it, they’d see that there are so many positives to being old:
• Senior discounts!
• Everyone accepts that you’re going to forget their birthday.
• Early Bedtimes!
• Wrinkles! Not sure why, We just think they’re cool.
• People are constantly inventing new things specifically to make your life easier!
This funny t-shirt is a clever mix between the classic grumpy senior and the classic dead dog, finally giving the name Old Yeller a more fitting owner. And don’t worry about the dog getting upset that his name’s been stolen. After all, he’s dead. (Spoilert alert!)
Tired of Laundry. Funny Logo Parody T-Shirt
Are you tired of laundry? Who isn’t? This funny t-shirt will get awesome reactions everywhere you go. Makes a great gift for Mother’s Day, Christmas, birthday or anytime!
Here is a list of things you should do instead of laundry:
• Go to Chick Fil A in a chicken costume and get mad at people for eating your friend Bob.
• Watch your favorite TV show from when you were a kid.
• Burst out laughing.
• Wrap yourself in bubble-wrap and roll down a grassy hill.
• Put a line of potatoes on the road and watch cars drive over them.
• Paint rocks and put them in random places.
• Give yourself a pat on the back. You achieved something today, it just wasn’t the laundry.
• Tie a peanut to a string and go squirrel fishing.
• Act like you can't speak English for a whole day.
• Build a fort in your closet.
• See what weird noises you can make.
• Eat chocolate.
• Put a magnet in your pants (or shirt) and see if you can stick to the fridge.
• Go to a hamburger place and order a pizza.
• Put on socks and run and slide on your hard wood floors.
• Draw something on the nearest person.
• Cut open glow sticks and dump them into bubble solution to make glow in the dark bubbles.
• Narrate everything your friend does.
• Act like a dog and see if your dog notices.
• Wave to various old people like you know them.
• Put money under your pillow every night. Then it will feel like the tooth fairy visits every night.
• Think about tacos.
• Go and eat samples in the supermarket.
• Go to a store and complain about the really high prices.
• Wack yourself with a pillow.
• Ride in a shopping cart at a store.
Here is a list of things you should do instead of laundry:
• Go to Chick Fil A in a chicken costume and get mad at people for eating your friend Bob.
• Watch your favorite TV show from when you were a kid.
• Burst out laughing.
• Wrap yourself in bubble-wrap and roll down a grassy hill.
• Put a line of potatoes on the road and watch cars drive over them.
• Paint rocks and put them in random places.
• Give yourself a pat on the back. You achieved something today, it just wasn’t the laundry.
• Tie a peanut to a string and go squirrel fishing.
• Act like you can't speak English for a whole day.
• Build a fort in your closet.
• See what weird noises you can make.
• Eat chocolate.
• Put a magnet in your pants (or shirt) and see if you can stick to the fridge.
• Go to a hamburger place and order a pizza.
• Put on socks and run and slide on your hard wood floors.
• Draw something on the nearest person.
• Cut open glow sticks and dump them into bubble solution to make glow in the dark bubbles.
• Narrate everything your friend does.
• Act like a dog and see if your dog notices.
• Wave to various old people like you know them.
• Put money under your pillow every night. Then it will feel like the tooth fairy visits every night.
• Think about tacos.
• Go and eat samples in the supermarket.
• Go to a store and complain about the really high prices.
• Wack yourself with a pillow.
• Ride in a shopping cart at a store.
Haunted Floating Shopping List / Ghost Funny T-Shirt
“Oh my gosh, it’s a FLOATING SHOPPING LIST!!!!!!!!”
“I’m, not a shopping list, I’m a ghoooooooooost!!!!!
For those of you who have also watched Spongebob Squarepants so many times that you know more Patrick quotes than loved ones’ birthdays, this shirt is instantly recognizable and lovable. For those of you who have no idea what you are currently looking at… will we get in trouble for calling you “uncultured”? That’s the word we’re leaning towards.
This episode is a genuine classic. We all know the scene: Mr. Krabs had sold Spongebob an old soda drinking hat, and soon after realized that it was worth a fortune. After several failed attempts to get the hat back, Mr. Krabs decides to scare him into giving the hat back. A piece of paper is fastened to a fishing pole. Thus leading us to:
“Oh my gosh, it’s a FLOATING SHOPPING LIST!!!!!!!!”
“I’m, not a shopping list, I’m a ghoooooooooost!!!!!
(This also shows how extremely gullible Spongebob is)
Then a bunch of weird things happen, and pretty soon Mr. Krabs is searching for Smitty Werbanjagermanjensen and defiling graves for money. Then he kills a bunch of skeletons (figure that one out) and pretty much ruins the cemetery.
And if none of that made sense in the least… we’re still gravitating toward the word “uncultured”. But people can always change - and we sure hope you do.
Either way, this shirt is the absolute perfect gift for Spongebob fans! Imagine them opening the gift, their eyes, getting wide in surprise and glee, shrieking for joy and yelling:
“Oh my gosh, it’s a FLOATING SHOPPING LIST!!!!!!!!”
“I’m, not a shopping list, I’m a ghoooooooooost!!!!!
This is your shirt, Mr. Krabs. You are number one!
“I’m, not a shopping list, I’m a ghoooooooooost!!!!!
For those of you who have also watched Spongebob Squarepants so many times that you know more Patrick quotes than loved ones’ birthdays, this shirt is instantly recognizable and lovable. For those of you who have no idea what you are currently looking at… will we get in trouble for calling you “uncultured”? That’s the word we’re leaning towards.
This episode is a genuine classic. We all know the scene: Mr. Krabs had sold Spongebob an old soda drinking hat, and soon after realized that it was worth a fortune. After several failed attempts to get the hat back, Mr. Krabs decides to scare him into giving the hat back. A piece of paper is fastened to a fishing pole. Thus leading us to:
“Oh my gosh, it’s a FLOATING SHOPPING LIST!!!!!!!!”
“I’m, not a shopping list, I’m a ghoooooooooost!!!!!
(This also shows how extremely gullible Spongebob is)
Then a bunch of weird things happen, and pretty soon Mr. Krabs is searching for Smitty Werbanjagermanjensen and defiling graves for money. Then he kills a bunch of skeletons (figure that one out) and pretty much ruins the cemetery.
And if none of that made sense in the least… we’re still gravitating toward the word “uncultured”. But people can always change - and we sure hope you do.
Either way, this shirt is the absolute perfect gift for Spongebob fans! Imagine them opening the gift, their eyes, getting wide in surprise and glee, shrieking for joy and yelling:
“Oh my gosh, it’s a FLOATING SHOPPING LIST!!!!!!!!”
“I’m, not a shopping list, I’m a ghoooooooooost!!!!!
This is your shirt, Mr. Krabs. You are number one!
Packed With Jesus, Scriptures Really Satisfies! Funny Christian T-Shirt
Get big laughs with this funny bible shirt for Christians! Packed with Jesus, SCRIPTURES really satisfies! Makes a great gift! Wear this at your next church function and entertain the masses!
Here are a few ways scriptures are like candy bars:
• You can usually find them at hotels
• Harder outer shell with soft center
• Both are popular at Christmastime
• Your dentist would not be happy if you ate either one.
• There are a lot of different versions of each.
• Open and enjoy!
Here are a few ways scriptures are different from candy bars:
• Taste
• A lot of candy bars have nuts. A lot of nuts have scriptures. :)
• When you go trick or treating, you don’t come home with a bag full of bibles.
Here are a few reasons why scriptures are better than candy bars:
• No cavities
• Scriptures are better for you.
• Feasting on the word of God does not make you fat.
Here are a few ways scriptures are like candy bars:
• You can usually find them at hotels
• Harder outer shell with soft center
• Both are popular at Christmastime
• Your dentist would not be happy if you ate either one.
• There are a lot of different versions of each.
• Open and enjoy!
Here are a few ways scriptures are different from candy bars:
• Taste
• A lot of candy bars have nuts. A lot of nuts have scriptures. :)
• When you go trick or treating, you don’t come home with a bag full of bibles.
Here are a few reasons why scriptures are better than candy bars:
• No cavities
• Scriptures are better for you.
• Feasting on the word of God does not make you fat.
Thunder Thighs Funny Parody T-Shirt
It’s true, the term Thunder Thighs can have some negative connotations but not around here! Celebrate your awesome thunder thighs with this funny shirt. This is the perfect shirt to wear while working out, playing sports, and otherwise showing off your powerful thighs.
Thunder: the sound that follows a flash of lightning and is caused by sudden expansion of the air in the path of the electrical discharge.
Thighs: the proximal segment of the vertebrate hind or lower limb extending from the hip to the knee.
Thunder Thighs: the proximal sound that follows a segment of lightning limbs and is caused by sudden vertebrate of the hind air in the path of the electrical hip discharge of the knee.
If that last one didn’t make sense to you it’s because you’ve probably never experienced actual thunder that has actual thighs. I wish I could say the same…
Late one night, I was walking home from a comedy show when I happened upon a freak storm. A freak storm with legs. As the thunder began to roll I caught a brief glimpse of it’s thunder thighs, followed by a thunder shin coming my direction. I scarcely had time to react before a thunder foot kicked me so hard I flew violently through the air. I was hurled across the street into a city park and crash landed with force. Thrashing and rolling for quite some time, I eventually skidded to a stop. I slowly sat up and examined my surroundings. I found myself on the soccer field. In the goal.
Thunder – 1. Me – 0.
Thunder: the sound that follows a flash of lightning and is caused by sudden expansion of the air in the path of the electrical discharge.
Thighs: the proximal segment of the vertebrate hind or lower limb extending from the hip to the knee.
Thunder Thighs: the proximal sound that follows a segment of lightning limbs and is caused by sudden vertebrate of the hind air in the path of the electrical hip discharge of the knee.
If that last one didn’t make sense to you it’s because you’ve probably never experienced actual thunder that has actual thighs. I wish I could say the same…
Late one night, I was walking home from a comedy show when I happened upon a freak storm. A freak storm with legs. As the thunder began to roll I caught a brief glimpse of it’s thunder thighs, followed by a thunder shin coming my direction. I scarcely had time to react before a thunder foot kicked me so hard I flew violently through the air. I was hurled across the street into a city park and crash landed with force. Thrashing and rolling for quite some time, I eventually skidded to a stop. I slowly sat up and examined my surroundings. I found myself on the soccer field. In the goal.
Thunder – 1. Me – 0.
Bob For Apples Funny T-Shirt
It seems like everyone is passionate about a cause these days. People rally in crowds to promote better life, happiness, and peace. Wherever you go, there is a cause worth fighting for. Do you want to stand for something? Do you want to make a difference and inspire millions around you? There are tons of amazing and motivating causes to support!
This just isn’t one of them.
Bobbing for apples is a popular carnival game. Why? Well, we don’t really know. If you really look at it, it’s kind of a dumb idea. Finally, a game that combines our two least favorite things: fruit and drowning!
Who came up with this idea? We imagine the conversation went something like this:
“Hey, Larry, we just got a letter from the FDA….”
“Ah, what do they want?”
“They say they’re gonna shut down the carnival cause we don’t have any healthy food!”
“But nobody wants to eat healthy food at a carnival! We’d go broke!”
“Wait… what if we made it a challenge?”
“You mean like… drown them until they eat an apple?”
“I was thinking of making them sword fight with asparagus, but I like that idea better.”
Either way, bobbing for apples now exists. And this shirt is a great spin on that terrible idea! This Bob For Apples shirt is a good way to make fun of carnivals and non-profit organizations at the same time! Meet Bob, a squiggly stick figure with a mission: support apples! Why is this worth his time? What is he promoting? Nobody knows and nobody cares. He’s a pun so we like him!
This funny shirt makes a great gift for friends, family, carnivals goers, carnies, clowns, jugglers, sword swallowers, trapeze people, ring masters, lion tamers, and other weirdos, as well as protestors, and anyone who’s job title is “volunteer”.
This just isn’t one of them.
Bobbing for apples is a popular carnival game. Why? Well, we don’t really know. If you really look at it, it’s kind of a dumb idea. Finally, a game that combines our two least favorite things: fruit and drowning!
Who came up with this idea? We imagine the conversation went something like this:
“Hey, Larry, we just got a letter from the FDA….”
“Ah, what do they want?”
“They say they’re gonna shut down the carnival cause we don’t have any healthy food!”
“But nobody wants to eat healthy food at a carnival! We’d go broke!”
“Wait… what if we made it a challenge?”
“You mean like… drown them until they eat an apple?”
“I was thinking of making them sword fight with asparagus, but I like that idea better.”
Either way, bobbing for apples now exists. And this shirt is a great spin on that terrible idea! This Bob For Apples shirt is a good way to make fun of carnivals and non-profit organizations at the same time! Meet Bob, a squiggly stick figure with a mission: support apples! Why is this worth his time? What is he promoting? Nobody knows and nobody cares. He’s a pun so we like him!
This funny shirt makes a great gift for friends, family, carnivals goers, carnies, clowns, jugglers, sword swallowers, trapeze people, ring masters, lion tamers, and other weirdos, as well as protestors, and anyone who’s job title is “volunteer”.
Paradise City Funny Song Lyric T-Shirt
“Take me down to the Paradise City, where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.” Yeah but what would the welcome sign for Paradise City look like? This funny welcome street sign t-shirt plays on the Paradise City song lyrics by Guns N’ Roses.
When driving up to a small town, the first thing visitors notice is the welcome sign—every great town has one. Sometimes they're simple and heartwarming, other times they're pretty straightforward, but sometimes they are clever and funny. Here are a few of our favorite sayings on real life welcome signs across America:
• Gettysburg, South Dakota – “Where the battle wasn’t”
• Gravity, Iowa – “We’re down to earth! If Gravity goes, we all go!”
• Earth, Texas – “Welcome to Earth. Est. 1924”
• Saint Louis, Oklahoma – “Home of 179 friendly people, 1 pyromaniac, and 1 busy body”
• Hondo, Texas – “This is God’s country. Please don’t drive through it like hell”
• Cherryfield, Maine – “Blueberry capital of the world”
• Weed, California – “Weed like to welcome you”
• Hyder, Alaska – “The friendliest ghost town in Alaska”
When driving up to a small town, the first thing visitors notice is the welcome sign—every great town has one. Sometimes they're simple and heartwarming, other times they're pretty straightforward, but sometimes they are clever and funny. Here are a few of our favorite sayings on real life welcome signs across America:
• Gettysburg, South Dakota – “Where the battle wasn’t”
• Gravity, Iowa – “We’re down to earth! If Gravity goes, we all go!”
• Earth, Texas – “Welcome to Earth. Est. 1924”
• Saint Louis, Oklahoma – “Home of 179 friendly people, 1 pyromaniac, and 1 busy body”
• Hondo, Texas – “This is God’s country. Please don’t drive through it like hell”
• Cherryfield, Maine – “Blueberry capital of the world”
• Weed, California – “Weed like to welcome you”
• Hyder, Alaska – “The friendliest ghost town in Alaska”
Enjoy The Great Indoors Funny Introvert T-Shirt
David Attenbourough style:
Amazing.
Beautiful.
Breathtaking.
Yes, there’s nothing more appealing than the great indoors. From the vast, spacious carpet to the wild and rugged area behind the sofa, there’s nothing more marvelous than the exciting environment of your house. It features rushing waters (from the bathtub) and precarious natural structures (if you consider a table and chairs “natural”). Glorious bags of potato chips sit elegantly on elaborate pantry shelves. This wondrous scene is inhabited by creatures both big and small, from the mighty Dad to the humble Goldfish. Join us as we explore the heights and depths of this landscape, observing as the brave creatures accomplish great feats, such as microwaving dinner, and surviving great challenges, such as losing wifi. In this lush dwelling, you may find it fitting to call it, as many do, Home.
Vacation advertisement style:
Come on down to the great indoors! We’ve got all the great activities to make your summer vacation the best! We boast the best in getaway experiences, from our beautiful walls to our tropical, adventurous toaster oven! Try our popular attraction, the fridge! Have the time of your life scouring for a snack! Or engage in fun, family friendly activities such as watching TV, taking a nap, and even taking out the trash! And now for a limited time, we’ll even throw in a free, all expense paid night of trying to pay the darn rent! Regardless of how you spend your time, you’ll want to bring your camera to remember all the great times you’ve had! So plan your trip today to the one vacation spot that makes you feel right at home!
Survivor style:
5 people.
1 remote control.
Let the games begin.
Amazing.
Beautiful.
Breathtaking.
Yes, there’s nothing more appealing than the great indoors. From the vast, spacious carpet to the wild and rugged area behind the sofa, there’s nothing more marvelous than the exciting environment of your house. It features rushing waters (from the bathtub) and precarious natural structures (if you consider a table and chairs “natural”). Glorious bags of potato chips sit elegantly on elaborate pantry shelves. This wondrous scene is inhabited by creatures both big and small, from the mighty Dad to the humble Goldfish. Join us as we explore the heights and depths of this landscape, observing as the brave creatures accomplish great feats, such as microwaving dinner, and surviving great challenges, such as losing wifi. In this lush dwelling, you may find it fitting to call it, as many do, Home.
Vacation advertisement style:
Come on down to the great indoors! We’ve got all the great activities to make your summer vacation the best! We boast the best in getaway experiences, from our beautiful walls to our tropical, adventurous toaster oven! Try our popular attraction, the fridge! Have the time of your life scouring for a snack! Or engage in fun, family friendly activities such as watching TV, taking a nap, and even taking out the trash! And now for a limited time, we’ll even throw in a free, all expense paid night of trying to pay the darn rent! Regardless of how you spend your time, you’ll want to bring your camera to remember all the great times you’ve had! So plan your trip today to the one vacation spot that makes you feel right at home!
Survivor style:
5 people.
1 remote control.
Let the games begin.
Don't Talk To Strangers... Or Me, Thanks. Funny Introvert T-shirt
Do you hate it when people talk to you? It’s the worst, right? Now, we’re not talking about all people and situations but there are definitely times when you just really don’t want it to happen. You know, the times when you dread it with every ounce of your soul. Now you can use this old saying that your parents used to tell you before leaving the house to your advantage! Don’t talk to strangers. Or me, thanks!
Here are just a few of the places and situations where wearing this shirt will come in handy:
• On an airplane – Have you ever sat next to Mister or Miss Chatty on an airplane when all you really wanted to do was relax and enjoy some peace and quiet?
• At a party - Have you ever sat next to Mister or Miss Chatty at a party when all you really wanted to do was relax and enjoy some peace and quiet?
• At school – Have you ever been at school and people asked you all sorts of annoying questions?
• On a first date – Have you ever been on a first date and your date asked you all sorts of annoying questions?
• At work - Have you ever gone to work and wished everyone would just leave you alone?
• At your wedding – Have you ever gone to your own wedding and wished everyone would just leave you alone?
• Walking down the street – Have you ever been walking down the street and you can tell that the person coming toward you is going to talk to you about who knows what and you wish you could crawl into a hole or at least punch that person in the face?
Increase your chances of not getting talked to by wearing this funny shirt. However, it can backfire because people may love this shirt so much that they end up talking to you about it. In that case, we’re sorry but at least you get to talk about something interesting! Good luck out there!
Here are just a few of the places and situations where wearing this shirt will come in handy:
• On an airplane – Have you ever sat next to Mister or Miss Chatty on an airplane when all you really wanted to do was relax and enjoy some peace and quiet?
• At a party - Have you ever sat next to Mister or Miss Chatty at a party when all you really wanted to do was relax and enjoy some peace and quiet?
• At school – Have you ever been at school and people asked you all sorts of annoying questions?
• On a first date – Have you ever been on a first date and your date asked you all sorts of annoying questions?
• At work - Have you ever gone to work and wished everyone would just leave you alone?
• At your wedding – Have you ever gone to your own wedding and wished everyone would just leave you alone?
• Walking down the street – Have you ever been walking down the street and you can tell that the person coming toward you is going to talk to you about who knows what and you wish you could crawl into a hole or at least punch that person in the face?
Increase your chances of not getting talked to by wearing this funny shirt. However, it can backfire because people may love this shirt so much that they end up talking to you about it. In that case, we’re sorry but at least you get to talk about something interesting! Good luck out there!
I'm Hot (and sweaty) Funny Exercise T-Shirt
I’m Hot! (and sweaty). This funny t-shirt is perfect to wear while working out, running or any other form of exercise. Makes a great gift!
When engaging in physical activity, the blood vessels that go to your muscles dilate, causing an increase in blood flow and oxygen to the working muscles. This, along with a temporary increase in your metabolic rate, causes you to feel more energized. This “burst of energy” not only occurs during exercise, but also after you exercise. For example, working out in the morning or afternoon will cause you to feel energized throughout the day. Even if you are an evening exerciser, you will still burn just as many calories and feel better!
Here are some exercise tips:
• Set Realistic Goals
• Remember To Warm-Up
• Include Carbs In A Pre-Workout Snack
• Include Protein And Healthy Fats In Your Meals
• Be Consistent
• Accept Feelings Of Discomfort
• Train With A Friend
• Add Some Motivating Workout Music
• Drink Plenty Of Water
• Pick An Activity You Enjoy Doing
• Listen To Your Body
• Allow Time To Rest
• Be Patient
• Make Sleep A Priority (Hey, We Have This One Down)
• Enjoy Nature While You Exercise
• Remember To Cool Down
• Wear Comfortable Clothing
• Add In Some Meditation
• Enjoy A Wide Variety Of Exercises
• You Don’t Need Fancy Equipment
• Put Your Phone On Airplane Mode
• Log The Details Of Each Workout So You Can Track Your Progress.
• If You’re Driven By Data, Invest In A Heart-Rate Monitor.
• Build In Active Recovery Days—They’re Important.
• Limit Your Workouts To 30-40 Minutes.
When engaging in physical activity, the blood vessels that go to your muscles dilate, causing an increase in blood flow and oxygen to the working muscles. This, along with a temporary increase in your metabolic rate, causes you to feel more energized. This “burst of energy” not only occurs during exercise, but also after you exercise. For example, working out in the morning or afternoon will cause you to feel energized throughout the day. Even if you are an evening exerciser, you will still burn just as many calories and feel better!
Here are some exercise tips:
• Set Realistic Goals
• Remember To Warm-Up
• Include Carbs In A Pre-Workout Snack
• Include Protein And Healthy Fats In Your Meals
• Be Consistent
• Accept Feelings Of Discomfort
• Train With A Friend
• Add Some Motivating Workout Music
• Drink Plenty Of Water
• Pick An Activity You Enjoy Doing
• Listen To Your Body
• Allow Time To Rest
• Be Patient
• Make Sleep A Priority (Hey, We Have This One Down)
• Enjoy Nature While You Exercise
• Remember To Cool Down
• Wear Comfortable Clothing
• Add In Some Meditation
• Enjoy A Wide Variety Of Exercises
• You Don’t Need Fancy Equipment
• Put Your Phone On Airplane Mode
• Log The Details Of Each Workout So You Can Track Your Progress.
• If You’re Driven By Data, Invest In A Heart-Rate Monitor.
• Build In Active Recovery Days—They’re Important.
• Limit Your Workouts To 30-40 Minutes.
Actions Speak Louder Than Words Funny T-Shirt
THE FOLLOWING ACCOUNT IS A TOTALLY REAL STORY. (Not really, but it sure would be great if it was.)
Once upon a time, in the mid-tropical-rural-suburban town of Wemadethisup, Oregon, two brave researchers with a lot of extra government funding decided to put a common theory to the test: Do actions really speak louder than words?
The experiments consisted of two simple tests: 3 volunteers were first told to speak as loud as they could, and proper sound measurements were taken. Then they were told to punch the brick wall placed in front of them, and the sound was measured again.
The results were shocking.
The speaking tests were average, averaging at 110 decibels. This didn’t surprise the researchers.
But they were surprised by the results of the action test.
The first volunteer transformed into a giant, muscular, green superhero and destroyed his entire wall, making an extremely loud crashing sound.
The second volunteer suddenly revealed that she was a talented opera soprano, and as she punched the wall she began to sing about her feelings, shattering nearby glass and scaring off spectators.
The third participant, strangely enough, had a talking hand, and when the participant slammed it against the wall, the hand screamed “OW HEY WHAT GIVES!?!?!”.
The results came back, and nobody could figure out what the heck any of it meant so they shut down the research center. And that action spoke louder than all of the previous words.
If you believe that actions do speak louder than words, then this shirt is a funny way of showing it! Though actions usually can’t talk, on this shirt they do! And much louder than words do! It’s perfect for grammar geeks, overly literal people, or people who just like to think outside the box.
Once upon a time, in the mid-tropical-rural-suburban town of Wemadethisup, Oregon, two brave researchers with a lot of extra government funding decided to put a common theory to the test: Do actions really speak louder than words?
The experiments consisted of two simple tests: 3 volunteers were first told to speak as loud as they could, and proper sound measurements were taken. Then they were told to punch the brick wall placed in front of them, and the sound was measured again.
The results were shocking.
The speaking tests were average, averaging at 110 decibels. This didn’t surprise the researchers.
But they were surprised by the results of the action test.
The first volunteer transformed into a giant, muscular, green superhero and destroyed his entire wall, making an extremely loud crashing sound.
The second volunteer suddenly revealed that she was a talented opera soprano, and as she punched the wall she began to sing about her feelings, shattering nearby glass and scaring off spectators.
The third participant, strangely enough, had a talking hand, and when the participant slammed it against the wall, the hand screamed “OW HEY WHAT GIVES!?!?!”.
The results came back, and nobody could figure out what the heck any of it meant so they shut down the research center. And that action spoke louder than all of the previous words.
If you believe that actions do speak louder than words, then this shirt is a funny way of showing it! Though actions usually can’t talk, on this shirt they do! And much louder than words do! It’s perfect for grammar geeks, overly literal people, or people who just like to think outside the box.
Don't Push Your Luck Funny Unisex T-Shirt
This fun t-shirt illustrates the saying “Don’t Push Your Luck.”
Push Your Luck defined:
to try too hard to get a particular result and risk losing what you have achieved.
Here are some other things you should not push:
• My buttons
• It
• An angry llama
Here are some things you should push:
• A push-pop
• A person about to get hit by a train.
• The envelope
Here are some people that are pushy:
• Rhonda
• Larry
• Susie
(The names have been changed to protect the guilty)
Push Your Luck defined:
to try too hard to get a particular result and risk losing what you have achieved.
Here are some other things you should not push:
• My buttons
• It
• An angry llama
Here are some things you should push:
• A push-pop
• A person about to get hit by a train.
• The envelope
Here are some people that are pushy:
• Rhonda
• Larry
• Susie
(The names have been changed to protect the guilty)
I'm An Adult Funny T-Shirt
If you’ve been looking through our website, you may realize that we have a major lack of seriousness. Don’t be alarmed, we aren’t children… though that would be great. Children always talk about how much they want to grow up, yet when we do, we just want to be kids again! You never know what you have until you stop wearing diapers…
So, yes, we are adults. But only because that’s how time works. We have exceeded the legal age of adulthood, and what do we get? A life of responsibilities! What kind of a reward is that for surviving 18 years? We should get a 1 year vacation before the responsibilities pack on. But alas, that is not the case.
However, we’ve figured out the secret to enjoying your adulthood: be a kid inside! Just because you’re an adult doesn’t mean you have to be so serious! Get creative! Get funny! Get weird! Now, you don’t have to act like a wild toddler- that would probably get you kicked out of the bank. But if you randomly asked the bank teller what their favorite dinosaur is, it would probably make their day!
Sometimes people wonder what the secret to enjoying life is. We think that the kids figured it out already! Life’s too short to take everything so seriously! We guarantee that if you let the kid inside be part of your life, you will enjoy your life a little more.
So yes, we are adults. But deep down inside, in the very depths of our hearts, there’s a little kid going absolutely nuts. This shirt’s for you, kid. This is for all the joy we’ve had, and all the joy we’ve given. This is for the fun, the games, the laughter, and the weird ideas. Thanks, metaphorical little kid. We couldn’t have done it without you.
So, yes, we are adults. But only because that’s how time works. We have exceeded the legal age of adulthood, and what do we get? A life of responsibilities! What kind of a reward is that for surviving 18 years? We should get a 1 year vacation before the responsibilities pack on. But alas, that is not the case.
However, we’ve figured out the secret to enjoying your adulthood: be a kid inside! Just because you’re an adult doesn’t mean you have to be so serious! Get creative! Get funny! Get weird! Now, you don’t have to act like a wild toddler- that would probably get you kicked out of the bank. But if you randomly asked the bank teller what their favorite dinosaur is, it would probably make their day!
Sometimes people wonder what the secret to enjoying life is. We think that the kids figured it out already! Life’s too short to take everything so seriously! We guarantee that if you let the kid inside be part of your life, you will enjoy your life a little more.
So yes, we are adults. But deep down inside, in the very depths of our hearts, there’s a little kid going absolutely nuts. This shirt’s for you, kid. This is for all the joy we’ve had, and all the joy we’ve given. This is for the fun, the games, the laughter, and the weird ideas. Thanks, metaphorical little kid. We couldn’t have done it without you.
This Shirt Has Nothing Printed On It Funny T-Shirt
Shirts come in all different varieties. Some have humorous dialogue, others have fancy art, and others have patterns and colors. Some represent sports teams, hobbies, and places. Some show off company names and logos. Shirt designs can promote a tourist destination or a celebrity. Shirts come in every kind of creative diversity imaginable.
But not this shirt.
This shirt has nothing printed on it. You can tell by looking at it there is NOTHING on this shirt!
When people look at your shirt, they will notice that there is nothing on it. You may even get comments about the nothing on your shirt. After all, it’s not common to see a shirt with nothing on it.
Now, here at Shane’s Brain, we do not support wearing nothing. That’s called streaking, and it’s a crime. But if you’re already wearing a shirt, we totally endorse having nothing on that shirt. We also do not support being nothing wearing a shirt. If you’re nothing wearing a shirt, that would mean you are a ghost, which is scary. Equally we don’t want you to wear a shirt with nothing in it. That would mean you’re wearing the shirt inside out, and that’s wrong.
This shirt is guaranteed to be a favorite for anybody! And if they don’t get it, at least it will be funny to see them stare at nothing.
But not this shirt.
This shirt has nothing printed on it. You can tell by looking at it there is NOTHING on this shirt!
When people look at your shirt, they will notice that there is nothing on it. You may even get comments about the nothing on your shirt. After all, it’s not common to see a shirt with nothing on it.
Now, here at Shane’s Brain, we do not support wearing nothing. That’s called streaking, and it’s a crime. But if you’re already wearing a shirt, we totally endorse having nothing on that shirt. We also do not support being nothing wearing a shirt. If you’re nothing wearing a shirt, that would mean you are a ghost, which is scary. Equally we don’t want you to wear a shirt with nothing in it. That would mean you’re wearing the shirt inside out, and that’s wrong.
This shirt is guaranteed to be a favorite for anybody! And if they don’t get it, at least it will be funny to see them stare at nothing.
I Teach Therefore I Am Really Tired Funny Teacher T-Shirt
This funny teacher shirt makes a great gift for anyone that teaches whether it be preschool, elementary school, middle school, high school, college, and more. Whether it’s math, science, special education, or something else, this t-shirt fits the bill. Teaching is hard work and it can be very taxing and tiring. Teachers love this fun shirt that proudly proclaims what they do and softly adds some subtle humor and truth with the small print.
I have many family members who are or have been teachers. I have seen first hand the sacrifices they make for others. They are truly my heroes! Go teachers!
I have had many wonderful teachers that have been a positive influence in my life. I have learned so much and been inspired by their interest in me and dedication to their students, their schools and their communities. Go teachers!
I had a few terrible teachers. I mean, some real stinkers. But to be fair, I’m sure they would say the same about me. I wasn’t exactly the ideal student. I was a goof-off much of the time and when I wasn’t goofing off, I was like the small print on this shirt… really tired.
I became quite good at sleeping in class. I even laid down on the floor once in one of my classes and got a decent nap in before the teacher discovered me. I was also pretty good at sleeping while pretending to read. It’s an art.
A few years ago, one of my kids said to me, “You know, they really should have nap time in high school.” I said, “They do, It’s called health class.”
My health class was first period and my seat was right next to the heater. Those two factors mixed with the subject matter, and I was out like a light. My teacher would regularly wake me up and ask me questions relating to his lecture and I would simply respond with “I don’t know… I was sleeping” – which all the football players in the class thought was pretty funny.
They were right.
I have many family members who are or have been teachers. I have seen first hand the sacrifices they make for others. They are truly my heroes! Go teachers!
I have had many wonderful teachers that have been a positive influence in my life. I have learned so much and been inspired by their interest in me and dedication to their students, their schools and their communities. Go teachers!
I had a few terrible teachers. I mean, some real stinkers. But to be fair, I’m sure they would say the same about me. I wasn’t exactly the ideal student. I was a goof-off much of the time and when I wasn’t goofing off, I was like the small print on this shirt… really tired.
I became quite good at sleeping in class. I even laid down on the floor once in one of my classes and got a decent nap in before the teacher discovered me. I was also pretty good at sleeping while pretending to read. It’s an art.
A few years ago, one of my kids said to me, “You know, they really should have nap time in high school.” I said, “They do, It’s called health class.”
My health class was first period and my seat was right next to the heater. Those two factors mixed with the subject matter, and I was out like a light. My teacher would regularly wake me up and ask me questions relating to his lecture and I would simply respond with “I don’t know… I was sleeping” – which all the football players in the class thought was pretty funny.
They were right.
Baby I'm Dead Inside Funny Baby it's Cold Outside Parody T-Shirt
Baby, I’m Dead Inside
I really don’t care
Baby I’m dead inside
Please go over there
Baby I’m dead inside
This evening has been
Been hoping that you'd dropped dead
Not very nice
I'll hold your hands they're just like mice
My mouse, he is soft and furry
He’ll taste pretty good in a curry?
Soon I will be locking the door
Hey baby what’s the fireplace for?
So really you’d better scurry
If I were me I’d hurry
Well maybe I don’t drink anymore
I'll piss some landlords off ‘cause I’m bored
The neighbors might stink
Yeah, it smells bad out there
Say where is my shrink?
No stabs to be had out there
I wish I knew cows
Your pies are like bar fights now
To break this smell
I'll take your hate, your hair looks like hell
Why thank you
I ought to say no, no, no sir
Mind if move in poser?
At least I'm gonna say that I died
What's the sense of breaking my stride?
I really don’t care
Baby don't hold trout
Baby I’m dead inside
Ah, you're very smushy you know?
I like to think of it as antagonistic
You simply must go
Baby I’m dead inside
The answer is woe
But Baby I’m dead inside
Unwelcome has been
How lucky that you dropped dead
So mice and farm
Look out the window at that swarm
My blister will be nutritious
Gosh your chips look delicious!
My other will be there at the store
Waves upon a tropical snore
My mind mind mind mind is vicious
Gosh your chips are nutritious!
Well maybe just a clarinet more
Never such a lizard before
And I don't even choke
You’ve got to get home
I hope you freeze out there
Say lend me your gnome
You’re gonna sneeze out there!
You've really been lame,
I feel when I touch your shame
But don't you see?
How can’t you do this thing to me?
There's bound to be stalk tomorrow
Think of my life long sorrow!
At least there will be plenty denied
If you caught corona and died!
I really don’t care
Get over that old trout
Baby I’m dead
Baby I’m dead inside
Okay fine, just another drunk hen
That took a lot of existing!
I really don’t care
Baby I’m dead inside
Please go over there
Baby I’m dead inside
This evening has been
Been hoping that you'd dropped dead
Not very nice
I'll hold your hands they're just like mice
My mouse, he is soft and furry
He’ll taste pretty good in a curry?
Soon I will be locking the door
Hey baby what’s the fireplace for?
So really you’d better scurry
If I were me I’d hurry
Well maybe I don’t drink anymore
I'll piss some landlords off ‘cause I’m bored
The neighbors might stink
Yeah, it smells bad out there
Say where is my shrink?
No stabs to be had out there
I wish I knew cows
Your pies are like bar fights now
To break this smell
I'll take your hate, your hair looks like hell
Why thank you
I ought to say no, no, no sir
Mind if move in poser?
At least I'm gonna say that I died
What's the sense of breaking my stride?
I really don’t care
Baby don't hold trout
Baby I’m dead inside
Ah, you're very smushy you know?
I like to think of it as antagonistic
You simply must go
Baby I’m dead inside
The answer is woe
But Baby I’m dead inside
Unwelcome has been
How lucky that you dropped dead
So mice and farm
Look out the window at that swarm
My blister will be nutritious
Gosh your chips look delicious!
My other will be there at the store
Waves upon a tropical snore
My mind mind mind mind is vicious
Gosh your chips are nutritious!
Well maybe just a clarinet more
Never such a lizard before
And I don't even choke
You’ve got to get home
I hope you freeze out there
Say lend me your gnome
You’re gonna sneeze out there!
You've really been lame,
I feel when I touch your shame
But don't you see?
How can’t you do this thing to me?
There's bound to be stalk tomorrow
Think of my life long sorrow!
At least there will be plenty denied
If you caught corona and died!
I really don’t care
Get over that old trout
Baby I’m dead
Baby I’m dead inside
Okay fine, just another drunk hen
That took a lot of existing!
Lord of the Pins Funny Bowling T-Shirt
This funny Lord Of The Pins t-shirt is perfect for any avid bowler. Makes a great gift for the bowler in your life.
The Lord Of The Pins
Bowlbo celebrates his 111th birthday at the Shire Bowling Alley without inviting Framo Biggins, his cousin. Neither fellow is aware of the bowling alley’s nature, but the old fogie Goodolf realizes that it is a bowling alley of low quality. Seventeen years later, Goodolf tells Framo that he has confirmed that the bowling alley is the one owned and operated by the Dark Lord Suntanlotion long ago and counsels him not to go the Shire Bowling Alley for his birthday. As they leave, Goodolf promises to return for Framo's birthday party and buy him a free game, but fails to do so.
Framo sets out on a scooter, looking for a better bowling alley in Crinkfollow, accompanied by his gardener, Jam Magee, and his cousin, Tippin Pook. They are pursued by mysterious hoodlems, but meet a passing group of elderly women led by Marge. The fellows spend the night bowling with them, at the roadside, one lane bowling alley of Flaming Maggots. When they reach the bowling alley at Crinkfollow, they find a luxurious 18 lane bowling alley, complete with bar and arcade. They decide to challenge some other folks to a friendly competition. Tippin gets smoked by Old Man Willow, an old guy who hangs out at the alley, but manages to beat the mysterious Bom BadTom. Leaving, they are caught by a freak storm. Framo, awakening from the lightning strike he took to the head, manages to call Bom BadTom, who equips him with an ancient magic bowling ball.
The group then travel to the village of Beer, where they encounter a stranger named Striker. The innkeeper gives Framo a letter from Goodolf written three months before which identifies Striker as a friend. Striker leads the group into town. At the Lanes of Weathertop, they are bowling again when Framo discovers he is bowling with a cursed ball. Striker bowls a perfect game. Framo is pissed; Striker buys him some nachos to help smooth things over.
The Lord Of The Pins
Bowlbo celebrates his 111th birthday at the Shire Bowling Alley without inviting Framo Biggins, his cousin. Neither fellow is aware of the bowling alley’s nature, but the old fogie Goodolf realizes that it is a bowling alley of low quality. Seventeen years later, Goodolf tells Framo that he has confirmed that the bowling alley is the one owned and operated by the Dark Lord Suntanlotion long ago and counsels him not to go the Shire Bowling Alley for his birthday. As they leave, Goodolf promises to return for Framo's birthday party and buy him a free game, but fails to do so.
Framo sets out on a scooter, looking for a better bowling alley in Crinkfollow, accompanied by his gardener, Jam Magee, and his cousin, Tippin Pook. They are pursued by mysterious hoodlems, but meet a passing group of elderly women led by Marge. The fellows spend the night bowling with them, at the roadside, one lane bowling alley of Flaming Maggots. When they reach the bowling alley at Crinkfollow, they find a luxurious 18 lane bowling alley, complete with bar and arcade. They decide to challenge some other folks to a friendly competition. Tippin gets smoked by Old Man Willow, an old guy who hangs out at the alley, but manages to beat the mysterious Bom BadTom. Leaving, they are caught by a freak storm. Framo, awakening from the lightning strike he took to the head, manages to call Bom BadTom, who equips him with an ancient magic bowling ball.
The group then travel to the village of Beer, where they encounter a stranger named Striker. The innkeeper gives Framo a letter from Goodolf written three months before which identifies Striker as a friend. Striker leads the group into town. At the Lanes of Weathertop, they are bowling again when Framo discovers he is bowling with a cursed ball. Striker bowls a perfect game. Framo is pissed; Striker buys him some nachos to help smooth things over.
Different Is Good! Funny T-Shirt
We’re probably not the first to put the words” Different Is Good” on a t-shirt but we are the first to put it printed in reverse thus making it more different and more good. What’s the point of saying that “different is good” in the same old boring way as everyone else? That doesn’t sound very different.
Finally a t-shirt that you can read when looking at yourself in the mirror! Brilliant! I tell you, brilliant!
Finally a t-shirt that you can read when looking at yourself in the mirror! Brilliant! I tell you, brilliant!
If at first you don't succeed Funny T-Shirt
You have probably heard the saying, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” Well, we took that lame saying and made it funny.
We don’t really understand why the second “try” was even necessary. Maybe it’s supposed to make us feel like we should try again more than once. Yeah, that’s probably it. But we don’t think that is the best way to get that message across. They could probably have said it better. We think they should try again. Then try again. And again. And again. And then keep trying until they succeed. See, was that so hard?
Here is a list of things that we are perfectly fine with you giving up on if at first you don’t succeed:
• Murder
• Spelling
• Getting married
• Riding an ostrich
• Being a vegan
• Shoplifting
• Swearing in a different language
• Liking country music
• Grave robbing
• Skydiving
• Motivational speaking
• Square dancing
• Watching curling
• Drowning
• Trying to be rather charming.
• Feeding Crocodiles
• Donating a kidney
• Cocaine
• Arguing with a turtle
• Training a goldfish
• Performing open-heart surgery on yourself
• Espionage
• Giving up
We don’t really understand why the second “try” was even necessary. Maybe it’s supposed to make us feel like we should try again more than once. Yeah, that’s probably it. But we don’t think that is the best way to get that message across. They could probably have said it better. We think they should try again. Then try again. And again. And again. And then keep trying until they succeed. See, was that so hard?
Here is a list of things that we are perfectly fine with you giving up on if at first you don’t succeed:
• Murder
• Spelling
• Getting married
• Riding an ostrich
• Being a vegan
• Shoplifting
• Swearing in a different language
• Liking country music
• Grave robbing
• Skydiving
• Motivational speaking
• Square dancing
• Watching curling
• Drowning
• Trying to be rather charming.
• Feeding Crocodiles
• Donating a kidney
• Cocaine
• Arguing with a turtle
• Training a goldfish
• Performing open-heart surgery on yourself
• Espionage
• Giving up
My Favorite People Don't Call Me Funny Introvert T-Shirt
This funny t-shirt is perfect for introverts or anyone who hates answering the phone. “My Favorite People Don't Call Me” The perfect alterantive to those cheesy "My Favorite People Call Me Grandma" shirts. Yeah, we've been wanting to make fun of those for a while...
Some people think that it’s rude to not answer the phone. Well, we think that demanding that we halt our lives immediately and shift all our attention to you right this second no matter what is rude.
People who don’t get it, don’t get it but for some of us, talking on the phone is a real issue. We really do hate hate hate it.
Here are some excerpts from one of our favorite articles on the subject by Sophia Dembling where she outlines some of the reasons why she doesn’t like the phone:
“1. The phone is intrusive. It rings and we are expected to tear our minds away from whatever they were focusing on and refocus on whoever is on the other end of the line and whatever he or she has to say. This makes my brain hurt. My mind doesn't change direction easily.
2. Most phone calls are chit-chatty rather than deep. And we all agree: introverts don't like chit-chat. I have one friend who starts every call by asking, "Whatcha doin'?" I have no idea how to answer, except with "Nuthin'" or "Workin'" or "Cleaning the schumtz out of my computer keyboard." And I can't imagine that any of these answers could interest her, so the call immediately feels awkward.
I do have friends with whom phone conversations get deep and I enjoy those, but they require a block of time. When that kind of call ambushes me, it derails my whole day. I try to schedule them--and even so, a certain amount of bullet biting is necessary for me to keep the appointment.
3. Introverts tend to be slow thinkers and responders and long pauses don't go over well on the phone. If I am on the phone with a talkative person, I struggle to get my say. I end up doing a lot of listening and uh-huhing. After a while, I get bored.
4. It can be difficult to focus a busy, busy introvert mind on the abstraction that is telephone conversation. Listening to one thing and seeing something else is a lot of sensory input piled on top of everything that's already going on in our heads. This is exhausting and my mind often drifts back into itself; I have to force it back to the conversation.”
Some people think that it’s rude to not answer the phone. Well, we think that demanding that we halt our lives immediately and shift all our attention to you right this second no matter what is rude.
People who don’t get it, don’t get it but for some of us, talking on the phone is a real issue. We really do hate hate hate it.
Here are some excerpts from one of our favorite articles on the subject by Sophia Dembling where she outlines some of the reasons why she doesn’t like the phone:
“1. The phone is intrusive. It rings and we are expected to tear our minds away from whatever they were focusing on and refocus on whoever is on the other end of the line and whatever he or she has to say. This makes my brain hurt. My mind doesn't change direction easily.
2. Most phone calls are chit-chatty rather than deep. And we all agree: introverts don't like chit-chat. I have one friend who starts every call by asking, "Whatcha doin'?" I have no idea how to answer, except with "Nuthin'" or "Workin'" or "Cleaning the schumtz out of my computer keyboard." And I can't imagine that any of these answers could interest her, so the call immediately feels awkward.
I do have friends with whom phone conversations get deep and I enjoy those, but they require a block of time. When that kind of call ambushes me, it derails my whole day. I try to schedule them--and even so, a certain amount of bullet biting is necessary for me to keep the appointment.
3. Introverts tend to be slow thinkers and responders and long pauses don't go over well on the phone. If I am on the phone with a talkative person, I struggle to get my say. I end up doing a lot of listening and uh-huhing. After a while, I get bored.
4. It can be difficult to focus a busy, busy introvert mind on the abstraction that is telephone conversation. Listening to one thing and seeing something else is a lot of sensory input piled on top of everything that's already going on in our heads. This is exhausting and my mind often drifts back into itself; I have to force it back to the conversation.”
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